It still hurts...

It still hurts...
It's been 5 months and 10 days since you left us. We miss you so much. You are with us in everything we do. You are the first thing we think of in the morning, and you are the last thought as we go to sleep. I love you sweet baby. I miss you so much. Your Daddy and I are trying to live life as if it is normal, but it's hard and we want to give up. Being without you in our lives is the most wretched feeling.  My arms feel so empty, I long to hold you and cradle you in my arms. I long for your cry. You are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen in my life. I can see you clearly in my mind. I hope you are somewhere safe, I hope that you are warm and that you are smiling and in your grandmas arms. She will keep you safe. And she will love you. Just as your Daddy and I love you.

Daddy visits the spot where we scattered some of your ashes and he talks to you. I hope you can hear him. He has such a strong voice. I wish you could have felt his big hands hold you. You would know that you would always be safe. He misses you so much. I miss you so much. We love you Joy Marie. We love you so much...